As we run around in our everyday lives with work, friends, family, child care and career commitments all pressing on us, we are constantly striving to be everything to everyone without much thought for ourselves. How many of us fall into bed at night closely hugging our Blackberry or iPhone, sending last minute emails for work, booking future plans on line or updating our diaries? How many lunch times a week do we actually sit and eat a meal? How many of us are using that one hour gap to squeeze in a gym session, complete extra work, see our child’s teacher or simply fit in the food shop? What happened to lunches at Yo Sushi whilst reading Vogue, looking for outfit inspiration for the weekend? Lunch times sat with friends laughing or a quiet, reflective stroll in the sunshine seem a million years ago. Some time ago, in a time when life was simple, lunches were for eating what you wanted without calorie counting, when appearing wrinkles weren’t happening quiet so quickly, 4.30pm on a Friday meant vino o’clock and the only time we referenced a muffin top was in the context of a bakery. With so much going on and the pressure of having to do it all it’s no wonder our lives, dreams and desires are in lost baggage whilst we arrive empty handed at the corner of Haggard Ave and Tired Lane. So sometimes ladies it takes something big to happen to reset the Sat Nav of life and point you back in the direction of yourself. These often take the form of someone else’s celebrations and puts us in to one of lives happy ‘yes’ situations. So like any of us over worked, under paid ladies when the opportunity to spend a day at a spa arose I could think of no better way to spend the day, visions of hot saunas, deep massages, giggles with the girls and yummy lunches swiftly filled my head. Before I knew it I was fully booked and paid up to not one but two spa days! Clearly all the fabulous people are hitting spa’s for their birthdays and hen weekends. As a loyal friend I am only happy to support friends wishes! And so the countdown began...
One Month Pre Booking
I tried on my bikini and was instantly horrified by my porridgy thighs, rolls of lard on my stomach and wobbly bingo wings. The diet started immediately when I realised that holding my stomach in all day wasn’t a realistic option, I also started shopping for a more flattering bikini a simple task really unless you are a size ten bottom and a 32DD top, in which case there is no hope unless you fancy a frumpy M&S tankini that even your own mother won’t wear.
Two Weeks Pre Booking
The diet had already hit a few little glitches in the form of the office bacon butty run, a birthday dinner at ASK and an entire box of Thorntons chocolates due to the wild throws of Madame PMT. Tried on a Baywatch esq swimsuit, convinced it made my already huge stomach expand and gave me a saggy cleavage. Tried on my bikini again, still as horrified with the results, clearly another tack was required. Motivation came in the form of an email on Facebook when it became abundantly clear I was going to be the biggest girl there by quite a long way. As delighted as I am to be going to a spa, it is totally my luck to be going with tall, slim super model types. I quickly dragged my fat bum back on the diet bandwagon and through in some more exercise for good measure.
One Night Pre Booking
Frantically doing sit ups in an attempt to get my stomach from muffin top, where it clearly was to something that was a little more pancake (flat) like was becoming exhausting. I tried on the bikini for the final time and shamefully admitted defeat. Taking inspiration from Nigella I began to consider that the all in one birkini may be my only option at this point. Short of DIY lipo (I’m no good with needles, or blood and have quite an unsteady hand) I was going to have to accept my fat fate. In a feeble attempt to distract from the flab, cellulite and general lack of tone, I neatly painted all twenty nails, styled my hair in a tousled, steam friendly way and practised breathing in. Hopefully a pink lip stain will cover any blue lips from lack of oxygen.
Finally the big day arrived and I met all the other girls that had been invited. Within minutes I found myself in the changing room and the moment I had been dreading was finally here. As I took one last deep breath, I stepped out into the most beautiful spa.
As we sat in the steam room, relaxing (I had strategically placed a towel over my stomach/hip/thigh area, allowing myself a few more breaths!) I reflected on my feelings over the past few weeks and the extra stress I had put upon myself. I couldn’t help but giggle at myself, this was supposed to be a relaxing day, with me time and I had managed to turn it into another stress. Whilst I can’t honestly say I felt body confident, I could pick a thousand faults (couldn’t we all?) I can honestly say I had a wonderful time. The main fab thing about spa’s is that with all the treatments and chambers it’s hard to keep focused on all your self loathing. I didn’t leave the spa thinner or more toned but I did leave feeling so much more relaxed, having made new friends and with beautiful glowing skin.
xX
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